Subconscious Danger of Social Media

I had a thought at the end of last week that really threw a spanner in my inner works. I was reading my normal blogs and watching my usual YouTube subscriptions when I realised that I was subconsciously trying to emulate these women. I also realised that I’d been doing the same on personal platforms like Facebook and Instagram with friends.

Not a bad thing trying to emulate others for their strenght, their beauty, the things they have and have worked very hard for but it was making me feel bad about myself and that certain aspects of my life couldn’t compare. I felt that as I didn’t have a beautiful house or a rented flat, a new car, longer hair, a healthy figure, a Mulberry bag, high end make-up, a good diet etc that my life was some how lacking.

Which is ridiculous, these women work hard, really hard and I was feeling jealous that I didn’t have the same things. Now I know I work hard but these women are at different points in their lives and careers. It’s silly of me to try and ‘be’ them when I would be so much better off building myself up as a person and building my own life rather than looking through rose tinted glasses at theirs.

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I suppose that I just wanted to share this little thought as its been really quite impactful to me and I have been thinking a lot about it the few weeks.

I have done a digital detox since having this thought for 48 hours and felt better by the end of it but also cut off, like I was missing so much, where as years ago I’d never have known what others were doing every minute of the day. I did have the freedom to do some projects at home, read a physical book which I haven’t done for months and had a good clean out and re-organise.

I may start doing these 48 detox’s every other weekend to try and re-connect with the physical side of life rather than the virtual side.

Do any of you do this, have you been doing it subconsciously, would you detox, do you think its a problem?

K

Self Confidence

I have been thinking seriously about my weight and have been coming to terms with the fact that I really need to do something, now.

I’m comfortable in the fact that MrGuine is supportive of me and finds me attractive but I don’t want that to be my main focus. I know that relationships aren’t only about the physical side but I would like to feel attractive and sexy when we get close.

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I’ve been looking at the piles of coke cans, the take away boxes, the frozen meal cartons and chocolate wrappers in my fridge/pantry. I always tried to convince myself that I’m not a bad eater. I suppose in ways I’m not, I don’t do some of the things that seriously overweight people do but then again, they didn’t always eat like that either did they?

My problem is having the will power to do that. Its mainly when I feel bored, tired or sad. I use and abuse food and it’s not doing anything for me, I know for a fact that eating good, whole, non/minimal processed foods and light exercise will make me feel less tired and sad. Its just working out the motivation to do that.

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Friction burns along my thighs

At the moment I’m seeing food as a reward/comfort while I can feel my body saying no, we don’t need that and getting the result twenty minutes later with a bad tummy and a trip to the rest room.

I don’t wish to be ‘slim’, I’ve been there before and I don’t think it suits me. But I am short, about 5’1 and I think that if I got down to a more comfortable 10-12 size then it would be a lot easier on my health, heart, digestive system and physical ability. I’m not souly doing this for vanity reasons, I’m doing it so that I’m not out of breath walking up the stairs.

I’m currently a UK size 16. I’m all for body acceptance if its not an excuse to eat crap, become overweight, put your heart/health in danger and promote unhealthy diets. I drink a lot of caffeine, in the form of coke, red bull, iced lattes and tea’s loaded with sugar and I want to use body acceptance as a reason to feel better about how badly I eat.

Personally I feel that I’d like to at least get down to a size 10, which I haven’t been since upper school, I feel a bit ridiculous to think this at 26 but I have school friends who’s weight has not rocketed. I feel this would have a huge impact on my health and the benefits would probably be massive.

I’m going to stop my ramblings here for the moment as I think this is becoming a long post. I will touch base on this again in a few months to see how I’m doing.

K

Models Own Polishes – Initial Review

I’d been looking at the new metallic and matt polishes since they come out. I talked to a sales assistant at my local Models Own and she did loads of swatches of the metallic’s. She gave me an honest opinion and said that they weren’t as shiny as they could be but they look lovely with a top coat.

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I picked the shade Chrome Rose and questioned if they had any matt glosses. She said they didn’t but they had a matt top coat that could mattify any gloss, happiness.

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I’ve done a couple of quick shots of each that I bought as there was a special offer and will share my initial thoughts. I will apologise now about how sloppy the application is, as I was trying them all on I didn’t bother doing touch ups. I love pastel nail polishes but have surprisingly few in my collection.

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Blueberry Muffin

This is a lovely soft blue, it sets perfectly with two coats.

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Apple Pie

A soft mint-like green, something I’ve coveted for ages.

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Chrome Cerise

A fuchsia pink shade, these go on solid with just one coat, almost unheard of with nail polishes. You can see just slightly through though if you have longer nails so you may desire a second coat.

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Chrome Rose

Probably my favourite of the bunch, it really is a more rosy colour in the flesh.

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Matte Top Coat

This is fantastic and was very interesting to use.

Very happy with these to date, they’re beautiful shades and I’ve worn them several times.

K

Fleur Glosses

First off to all you girls and guys out there that do ‘swatches’ of colours/effects/highlighters on your own face/eyes/lips. I salute you. This took me hours and several re-applications and I’m still not happy with them or the way my lips look but I refuse to do it again. I will learn and improve.

I prep my lips with By Terry Baume De Rose, this is a 12ml pot, costs a small fortune but I bought mine 3 years ago and still haven’t hit pan.

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I generally leave this on while I do the rest of my make up.

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I am still not sure on this colour, its a weird one for me. I did need to prep my lips with concealer for this as personally on my bare lips it takes too many applications to get the colour pay off. Its a nice colour, I’m just not sure.

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Seeing Stars

On the other hand I adore this shade. This is one quick application and i’m ready to go. A real your lips but better shade, no concealer prep needed here.

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Written in the Stars

I recieved this shade for Christmas from a friend and I absolutely love it. I’m not one for reds and I have never worn a red lip until Christmas afternoon 2015. I was so pleased with this though, a little careful on the edges but its a gorgeous shade, moisturising and lasts really well!

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Starry Starry Night

You can find Fleurs glosses at feelunique.com

K

Smear Testing

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In the last year my family has been touched by cancer, through my wonderful cousin and my best friends Grandad.

Today I want to talk about Smear Testing; sometimes the difference between life and death. A pretty serious topic but one that I feel needs to be spoken about often. We live in a day and age where cancer testing has come on leaps and bounds, yet I feel that a massive amount of people are unaware of their options until its too late.

I watched a video by Michelle and she spoke about a friend that has recently been diagnosed with cervical cancer. At such a young age, this is something that I feel strongly about as I wasn’t aware of smear testing until my letter came at the age of 25, the standard age in the UK where the test is offered free on the NHS.

Jade Goody died several years ago after finding abnormal cells after a smear, a smear that came too late and her cancer was too advanced. She left two little boys without a mother and had barely started life herself. I was really saddened by this news but was young at the time and didn’t realise the impact that it should have had.

So I’m going to ask if you’d please be willing to sign the petition to Mr Cameron to lower the age of Smear Testing in the UK to 16. This could give so many girls, women, future mothers, aunties, sisters, friends, wife’s, fianc├ęs, girlfriends, daughters the opportunity to find anything abnormal earlier and have a better chance to fight it.

Ask yourself. What would you prefer, 16 and a chance to fight and cure it? Or nine years later, at 25, when those cells have possibly advanced to a horrible, incurable stage?

Thank you for either signing or your consideration.

K

 

Health

I have been looking over BMI scales and ideal weights. I know the old NHS BMI scales are flawed now as they don’t take into account that muscle weighs more than fat. However I’m pretty sure I have minimal muscles, so I’m going to see what sort of weight I should be. NHS BMI Calculator

I am 5’1 and I weight 13 stone, according to this I should weight in the region of, 6.7-9.3, this feels like a huge drop in weight (4 stone at the least) but it also makes me think about the implications that having this extra fat is doing to my body.

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We have Rheumatoid Arthritis (a chronic progressive disease causing inflammation in the joints and resulting in painful deformity and immobility, especially in the fingers, wrists, feet, and ankles) which in our family, mainly centered in the knees.

My knees already ache/click and I’m thinking that the extra weight is really speeding up the possibility of me developing this early. This isn’t a thought that brings comfort, it makes me feel that the burger I sneaked on a Wednesday night was not worth it.

I am however trying to think really positive about the whole situation. I don’t want to punish myself for eating bad in the past and making this a really negative life change.

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My eating is very attached to my emotions and I want to make this into a change that I can carry on through my adult life. I don’t want it to be a ‘diet’, I want it to be a new habit. I have been reading a lot of Inthefrow blog and the lovely Victoria has an incredibly positive and healthy outlook on her attitude to life. I highly recommend you look at her blog, the effort she puts into each post is astounding.

I’ve particularly been reading her Advice section which is really inspiring and has helped me to see that I’m letting a lot of outside influences effect my own inner being, that its dragging me down and I need to learn to brush off other peoples negativity and hate, to really focus on repairing my own confidence.

This is a reason why I’ve been trying so hard to cook so many more things at home from scratch. I’ve recently learnt how to make Chicken Katsu Curry, Chicken Teriyaki and have been trying out healthier home made pasta sauces, to try and stop consuming so many calories and MSG additives. I was gifted a lovely cookbook by MrGuine for Christmas and cannot wait to try the recipes in there either.

Have any of you been struggling with your weight and self confidence lately, if so how did you make the change, have you yet, will you?

K

New Buy’s Initial Review

Clinique

I have wanted a solid highlighter for a while, I didn’t want a powder or a liquid. I read reviews and found that the Chubby Stick Range from Clinique did one. I already have their contour stick and find it really easy to use.

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I decided that due to liking the other member of the range that I’d order it and see. I had seen ones that I liked from Dior and Burberry but wasn’t feeling the price tag.

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Swatching this I was pleasantly surprised, it was subtle but effective and really shined in the light without being glittery. I have been using this daily since it arrived and would highly recommend if you’re thinking about a solid highlighter.

Real Techniques

I had been using an old Ruby and Millie brush, no offence but it was a buffing brush for eyeshadow and I found that it was sharp & uncomfortable. Strange for this range but I decided to invest in some other brushes.

I am a big fan of Real Techniques tools, especially in love with their Bold Metal’s Collection. Beautiful and practical.

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I looked around and decided to go to Real Techniques directly and buy online. Delivery can take up to 21 days, if your able to just go out and buy it directly.

I was so excited when they arrived. In a fuchsia envelope and wrapped in black tissue paper. Each individually packaged and when opened they are well protected from any chance of scratching.

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The bristles themselves are soft but in a ‘firm’ cut so they actually do their job. I used these and was very happy, the 201 is brilliant. I’d highly recommend Sam and Nic’s Brushes, they are wonderful.

MAC

I am a regular reader of Pearls and Poodles. I loved the pigment eye shadows that she’d gotten and wanted to get some myself. I was a bit wary by them originally as about 5 years ago I got given a black and it was so intense/hard to blend and put me off. Silly really as they do dozens of shades.

I saw that she’d got a shade called Melon, it was pretty but I wasn’t 100% on it. I popped into MAC and looking through I found a rose gold shade that I liked so I went with that one.

Its called Tan. There is actually a dedicated Rose Gold shade but I just felt that it was a bit more on the gold side than I wanted.

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K